#it doesnt hurt as much as redditors say

[bigboymoozz]

I unfortunately have a cyst in my vagoochie, and I have reasons to suspect it's a gland. And I also made the mistake of looking up what a ruptured cyst like this looks like when I was reading how to get rid if it myself and tell me why it's just a large open wound ????#,#,#,#, I'm so scared hello???

[selamat-linting]

the struggle of being a critical bitch is that sometimes you see your mutuals being overly positive to the point of being defensive about something and the little inner demon inside you wants to have a discussion that you'd enjoy but you know your friends wouldn't. so you'd just twitch your eye and move on.

its not that im a hater, the problem is the more i care and enjoy something the more i like to poke and prod at its flaws and imagine ways it could be better and i have the cadence of a catty redditor. like, i have a web serial that basically saved my life and most of the posts i spread is about how much of a slog some of the chapters are and how bigoted it can be sometimes. even at my most deranged i will always have a negative thing to say to my latest interests. i was very much in support of giving fanfic authors unsolicited writing advice for the longest time. it took me a while to learn that most people doesn't like listening to criticism of the things they make or the things they like when they just want to unwind and de-stress. it makes them feel defensive.

i never seem to truly get it tbh, it just doesnt compute how people could feel hurt over unsolicited advice. i think you could just not listen when it doesnt benefit you. or be violent when they actually try to force you to change instead of just nagging. also, dont you want to make or have something you can be proud of? isnt being dedicated an act of passion and love? i think people should be more offended when theyre praised for the bare minimum or when theyre giving compliments that are obviously forced. like, for example, i think i respect people who told me i should wear lipstick better than people who grits their teeth and smile about how im so brave for being myself and going all natural. and yeah i have several cases where i mistook a genuine compliment as a backhanded insult. hehe. glad i never actually had a big drama over it though.

but, i am self aware enough to know that people have different boundaries and expectations. i know im not most people. and i dont like hurting my friends even if its just words. so i learn to shut up when im supposed to. but by god so many of you people are so annoying!!!!! and i dont like that i have to accommodate others this way. its like im using a different system language in my brain and everything i receive have to manually translated first for it to registee correctly and vice versa.

[constellaj]

Genuine question to your last humorous post (it got a chuckle out of me so thank you for that) would you say Danny ITA here? Or Sidney for that matter? I keep seeing mixed reviews on the both of them in the phandom per this episode and I’d love to hear your thoughts on it!

ok bet

i think danny is 14

heres the thing right is yeah blahblah abuse or whatever bad but a) middle school bullying is always comedically exaggerated for kids media, esp and DP and b) 14 year olds are just like that. like literally the capacity for empathy is not fully developed at that age. this is also recognized in-universe; Vlad goes iirc "of course you wouldnt understand, you're what, fourteen?" and danny says "hello misplaced aggression"-- so applying the "children are shitheads" logic isnt just something I can say from the armchair, but within the show itself. basically i think he gets a bit of a free pass on being an asshole because of the Circumstances that are about being a teenager

2. the argument that "fighting your bullies makes you as bad as them" IS a shit argument, but theres Context DP has

yeah yeah fight back against ur oppressors or w/e (please god remember dp is a show about a nerdy elmersona who thinks hes a better person than he is, and NOT a succint and valuable critique on class relations in contemporary america.) but like. buddy. he can walk thru walls disappear and fly. dudes bringing a gun to a fork fight. if we're reading into deep metaphorical language here then literally whatever danny is doing is 100000% worse than dash. dash does physical assault (bad). DANNY does physical assault (bad), reputational ruining (bad), mental assault/gaslighting (bad), and psychological trauma (very bad. we see in that same episode that getting possessed is absolutely horrifying and dannys just doing it for a Bit. a Joke. a Gag if you will). what I'm saying is if you want to approach this issue as a microcosm of a larger conceptual element, you cannot walk away from here saying danny is NTA. luckily for me i dont give a shit about this point like, at all, and in fact am mostly tired of hearing it

3. fuck sidney

maybe this is rewrite bleed (it is <3 I made him a redditor) but sidney is just so much of a nothing, stupid character it hurts. dude haunted the locker NEXT TO DASH for at least a school year and his first conclusion was that dash was some POOR VICTIM OF BULLYING? if we gloss over that then its just like. what does he do here. 1) terrifies children internationally with that possession sequence 2) traps danny in 50s hell 3) is the episodic antagonist 4) has an annoying voice 5) gets. redeemed? for some ungodly reason? sidney in this ep is a metaphor/stand-in for danny's recompense and Not Bullying, but he's. EVIL? but we're supposed to be chill with it? except when we're not. and SIDNEY bullying bullies is (goood? funny???) except when the narrative needs him to be the Good Person he totally drops that entire personality and is now bffs with dash? i do not understand what the fuck he means within the larger narrative, like at all. as such im just like. fuck this kid fuck this episode in its entirety and it makes me want to disagree with the episode premise just bc its poorly written

4. dash did nothing wrong

dash did nothing wrong. i have a brand to keep but for real tho like, the conceit of this episode is that bullying is normal within the world yeah? like its not GREAT but danny and sidney aren't demonized for it (the conflict is about like. learning to be liked as a person? OKAY fucking ripoff side tangent here but SIDNEY gets to be bffs with DASH and ALSO his 50s bully -- if Sidney is a character parallel to danny WHY DOESNT DANNY BEFRIEND DASH BY THE END OF THE EPISODE? GOD? IT MAKES NO SENSE) and dash's is just like. slightly annoying slapstick. dash's character is also built on super dumb hypermasculine traits like hazing, ie, a bonding experience (even though danny might not see it as such). instead of like. talking w dash. or using his powers to impress him. (you know. what sidney does. right here). danny just goes "die a thousand deaths" and slams his head into a locker. like. bro. Unproductive. PLUS when sidney DOES stop being a shithead to dash (again i will never understand why. hes a fucking trainwreck of a character), dash IMMEDIATELY does a 180? like hazing continues but after the football scene dash is genuinely impressed. bro if you just get on dash's playing field he will literally do nothing. according to this episode anyway

summary: this episode fucking sucks

basically i think this episode is horribly plotted + written and the overall message/theme gets very muddled very quickly because its more of a "what would happen, realistically??" story than a "this is a story with a message that the universe will bend to accommodate" and thats just like. NOT good for this kind of "is he an asshole" discussion. in a realistic setting id say yeah danny ITA because. bro. you could do LITERALLY anything else. but not in a condemnatory way. like if danny was telling this story at college and making fun of himself when he was 14 id be like omggg daniel you did NOT. shut up thats so funny.

anyway if im extrapolating whatever message this ep was trying to push, and debating it with the rest of danny phantom tumblr as if it were a cohesive plot worth arguing about, id say ESH. sam is supposed to be a "rebel" yet she hates beating up dash. sidney is supposed to fight for the "little guys" yet he doesnt fucking know dash is the bully. danny psychologically tortures people which i think is probably a war crime.

except dash tho. i have a brand to keep and that means that everything he did in this episode was fine actually. he was having a bad day <3 he beats the shit out of dweebs to cope <3

[datingadviceonreddit]

Hello Redditors,first of all, sorry if not everything in this posting makes sense. English is not my Main Language. Also sorry that the Title doesnt say very much about the Topic of this posting, don't know how to phrase it better.I have a little "Situation" here that i'd like to have some independent opinions on. I will try to keep it short and simple.I recently (like 6 months ago) split up with my long-term girlfriend, we have a 3 year old Child together. The relationship was very vocally abusive from her side and it came to a point where i just couldnt take it anymore. Shortly after i ended the relationship, i met another woman. I started to like her really fast, even though she is still in a relationship which isnt going very well. I Know it's a shitty Move to mess with another relationship, but i really like her. Doesn't make it better though. It all started around October last year. While i was planning to move out of the shared appartment with my now ex-girlfriend, i was already talking with this new girl about how to go on with our relationship. Since she also has a little Daughter, she asked me to wait until after Christmas/New Years for us to move on so her Daughter can spend Christmas with her current Partner who isnt her biological Dad but she still sees him as her Dad. Of course i agreed to this since i know it would be a tough time for her Daughter and doing this before Christmas would just be too much.Meanwhile i was allowed to go on a 3 week treatment together with my Daughter. The last Years of my Relationship had been taking its toll on my Health, so my Doctor prescribed me this Treatment. I wanted to take my Daughter with me so she gets to have a little break from the constant bad mood and Yelling from her mom at home. This Treatment was scheduled for the beginning of February. My plan was to move out of the Apartment after this Treatment. The Woman I'm interested in agreed to this, thinking it would also be good for my Daughter.So i went to this 3 week Treatment. While i was there, i talked to a psychologist about my plans of moving out. This psychologist basically told me to not just move out but instead talk to a child psychologist before, so my Daughter doesnt suffer any permanent Damage from this. She also told me not to advance with a new relationship until everything with my Daughter is settled. I thought this was very reasonable and i really dont want my Daughter to suffer too hard from all of this. (Of course i dont want my Daghter to suffer at ALL but i know it will be inevitable for her not to suffer because of this).After i returned from this treatment, i talked to the woman i'm interested in about the changes i need to do regarding our Plans. Basically i told her i'm not going to move out of the Apartment right now, but instead will do as i've been advised to do and go see a child psychologist. Since getting an appointment might take a while, it will be difficult for our relationship to progress. But i have to do this for my Daughter.As she was in a comparable Situation (Biological Father of her Daughter left her couple of months after she was born, her Daughter suffered heavily because of this) i thought she would understand this. But her reaction was "Well, i'm Done with this" and "I'm not gonna chase after a man". Also she said she doesnt believe me that the psychologist told me what i mentioned above. I Knew of course she wouldnt like this, but i didnt expect a reaction like this. After i took some Days to recover from this low blow, i wrote her a letter explaining to her that my decision doesnt mean i'm not interested in her anymore, but i simply need to do this for my Daughter. All in All i wrote her 4 Pages explaining this and also explaining that i'm still very much interested in her, i just need this time for my Daughter.After reading the letter she asked me "do you want me to answer this?". Of course i wanted an answer, so she told me we will talk about it on Thursday (it was a Monday when she got the letter). Thursday came and no reaction from her. Friday and still nothing. Weekend came and went without an answer. We saw each other again on Tuesday and she was wondering why i was "acting so strange" since i was being a little more distant than usual to her that Day. So i told her i was awaiting a response. So we finally sat together and talked about my letter. In the End she said she didnt know how to react to it and just didnt know how to form her thoughts into words.Her explanation was that she was already thinking about ending our relationship before i started the 3 weeks treatment. And while i was at this treatment she came to the conclusion that she didnt want it anymore, feeling were gone there already. She still likes me and sees me as a friend etc etc. . . .At first it sounded reasonable (or, well. . . .acceptable) to me. But in the meantime, i thought a lot about this.So what i'm wondering is: If everything she said is true and her feelings were already gone for (at least) 3 weeks, why would she react so Hurt when i told her i'm not moving out of the appartment as planned? Nobody says "I'm not chasing after a man" and "I'm done with this" if this person has actually already put it behind himself, right?So to me it seems like she actually still feels for me but doesnt want to admit it. Or Maybe i'm just clutching at any straw now? I'm really unsure what to do and how to react. I Still feel a lot for her.Hmm. . . .so in the End it was neither short nor simple. Would be thankful for any thought on this :) via /r/dating_advice